The700Level.com - Philly Sports & Minutiae

The Phillies Streak of Crooked Numbers Continues

Ain't a bad time to be a Phillies fan, and we know from hard times. With May coming to a close, it's looking like the Phils will contend to lead the league in runs scored for the third straight year. In the past five games, all (obviously) wins, they've averaged 12 runs scored. 12. And it's not as though they've desperately needed it, but the pitching has also been good, with Brett Myers even looking like he may yet turn this horrible season around.

In last night's edition, Myers looked ready to implode in the first, giving up three runs on three hits and two walks. His body language was all Angry Brett, and things were looking bleak to start the series with the first-place Marlins.

Probably the Coolest Throne Room Ever.

As you prepare to get your weekend started, either with a few beers or a household project, you might be inspired by what reader Stephen Wojcik created when remodeling his bathroom. Whereas I went with a boring white wainscot and drywall motif when my friends and I remodeled my john in November, our man Steve took his fandom up a notch, tiling a brilliant Eagles mosaic.

There should be a Real Men of Genius commercial dedicated to this masterpiece. More pics after the jump.

In Search of the Next Matt Ryan

I'm actually on a train right now on my way up to Boston for my five year college reunion (old!) this weekend so posting may be sparse. While I'm in search of an Anna's Taqueria burrito and perhaps a even a Gobbler from Eagles Deli, you can enjoy these highlights of the week.

• The Phanatic makes me happy.
• The Phillies put up a 20 spot on the Rockies en route to a sweep.
• Vai vs. Jose is all set.
• Eagles cheerleaders are heading to Iraq.
• Mike went fishing with Dean Ween.
• Matt went to the Phils rainfest.
• Von Hayes is a seaman.

Enter the Seanez

Remember that cold, rainy opening day, when the Phils bullpen (namely Tom Gordon) gave up a late lead and shook our early confidence to the core? We do (kinda). It's easy to forget now though, with sobriety taking hold and the bullpen consistently posting just about the best numbers in the NL since then.

In the immediate wake of that tragedy, the Phils made a great move in signing veteran 'penner Rudy Seanez. We knew at the time he'd likely be a nice piece to help stabilize what we thought was a scarily inconsistent bullpen, but what we didn't know, was that he was practically a ninja in his spare time.

Not once in the 17 years Rudy Seanez has pitched in the big leagues has he hit a batter who then came running at him wielding his bat.

The durable Phillies reliever has no idea what would have happened if a player actually had, but chances are one of them would have ended up with a black eye.

And it would not have been Seanez.

"Knock on wood - no, it has never happened," said Seanez. "But if someone else did, there would be trouble. If someone comes at me with a bat in his hand, I am not holding back anything."

"Anything" could be nearly everything, given the self-defense skills of Seanez, who has become a pretty fair hand at a variety of martial arts - including shootfighting, Muay Thai and both Brazilian and Japanese jiujitsu.

Utley All-Star Animals Casino Night Video Highlights

As we mentioned yesterday, Philly's first couple, Chase and Jen Utley, hosted a casino night to support the Pennsylvania SPCA. As if Chase needed help stealing the hearts of the local ladies, he's also involved in animal rescue efforts. On their only night off this week, the Phils turned out in force to support the Utleys in their quest to save PA's four-legged friends and maybe get some black jack in. Comcast SportsNet's video highlights after the jump.

New Philly.com Can Time Travel

That right there to your right is a screen cap of Philly.com's main sports page at exactly 2:36 AM this morning. (Yes, we prefer to sleep when it's light out.)

As you may notice, the stories mostly have to do with college basketball games. That took place in January, roughly four months ago.

Now, we realize it's a slow news day without the Phils playing last night. But can't you come up with something more fun like a future news story that hasn't happened yet? How about: "Burrell Leads Phils to '08 World Series, Mets Manager Gary Carter Fired"

When you're in dire need of new material, you can always just go nitpick about some other website anyway. It's easy!

Mentioned stories: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Quotable: Keith Jones on Saving Eric Lindros's Life

By now you've probably heard the amazing story of how Keith Jones, winger for the Flyers and linemate/road roommate of Eric Lindros, found the oft-concussed star shivering in a cold bath one night. From the wiki:

During an April 1, 1999 game against the Nashville Predators, Lindros suffered what was diagnosed as a rib injury. Later that night, the teammate he was sharing a hotel room with, Keith Jones, discovered Lindros lying in a tub, pale and cold. In a call to the Flyers, the trainer was told to put Lindros on a plane that was returning to Philadelphia with injured team mate Mark Recchi. But Jones insisted that Lindros be taken to a nearby hospital and it was discovered Lindros had a collapsed lung caused by internal bleeding of his chest wall. It was estimated he'd bled out more than half his body's total blood volume. Lindros's father wrote the Flyers a letter in which he stated that if the trainer had followed team orders, Eric would be dead (a statement supported by the doctors who treated him in Nashville).

Nine years later, Lindros has retired into obscurity, and Jones is one of the best hockey analysts in the business. Anyone who's followed Jonesy will tell you, he hasn't lost a beat with the sense of humor he displayed on the ice and in the locker room. So what'd he have to say when Comcast SportsNet host Michael Barkann dropped an impromptu mention of the event during a Flyers season-wrap package?

Lito as a Receiver? Eagles May Try It

950 ESPN's Brian Seltzer reported on Mike Missanelli's show this afternoon that the Eagles are considering using odd man out CB Lito Sheppard on offense as a receiver in certain packages.

Seltzer commented that in the past, Lito had floated the possibility of lining up at receiver to Andy Reid, but the Eagles never went for it. Now, with his starting job in the secondary taken by free agent Asante Samuel, the Eagles might be willing to grant the request to keep Lito happy in the event he can't be traded for what the front office considers his value to be. The whole idea is pretty odd (and oddly entertaining), especially considering that Lito is all of 5'10", and they've got enough undersized receivers to field an arena league team. Should be interesting to see how this one plays out...

Take a listen to a podcast of the report here.

Party Tonight With Chase, Jen, Jimmy, & Ryan at F.U.E.L.

Being the Phillies resident hard-nosed player, Chase Utley doesn't take many nights off. But with the Phils having the day off before they kind of a big series with the Marlins, Chase Utley won't be wasting his evening. Nope, he'll be saving the puppies.

Phillies slugger Chase Utley and wife Jennifer are expecting teammates - including Howard, Jimmy Rollins,  Pat Burrell, Cole Hamels and Jayson Werth - at their May 29 All-Star Casino Night and Silent Auction to benefit the Pennsylvania SPCA. Comcast SportsNet's Michael Barkann will emcee the private party at  F.U.E.L.  (249 Arch). Shane Victorino and Brett Myers are also expected to join the Utleys for the party to benefit the animal-welfare agency.

If there's one Phillie I think it'd be fun to hang out with it at F.U.E.L. it would totally be Charlie Manuel. [Dan Gross, 8th item]

Your 2007 National League East Champion New York Mets!

Oops. The New York Daily News puts it perfectly:

Welcome to Queens, where pigs can fly, the sky is always blue, and the Mets reign as defending National League East champions.

A tourism brochure, printed for $9,300 by the borough president's office, hails the Mets as winners last year - when they endured a historic collapse to miss the playoffs.

Pat Burrell Gets The Onion Treatment

PHILADELPHIA—8-year-old Easton, PA Little Leaguer Tyler Jenson and 31-year-old professional baseball player Pat Burrell were given identical tips on improving their swings and properly hitting a baseball Monday night. "Remember to keep your elbow up, keep your knees bent, and keep your eye on the ball," said both 45-year-old hardware-store manager and father of three Dale Kremke and retired Major League Baseball veteran of 18 years Milt Thompson to the two struggling hitters. "Watch the ball out of the pitcher's hand, and just meet the ball with the bat. Come on, now, just takes one." Both Burrell and Jenson struck out in their next at bat and returned to their respective dugouts in tears.

Insert obligatory "8 year olds" joke here.

>>8-Year-Old Little Leaguer, 31-Year-Old Professional Given Same Advice [TheOnion]

Eaton Wins!

Throwing six innings of one-run ball, Adam Eaton earned his first win of the season. Eaton, who got by with a little help from his defense, allowed four hits, struck out four and walked just one. And don't look now, but Eaton's ERA is now below 5.00...

Everybody Loves Chase Utley

And with good reason.

Utley leads all NL players with 537,788 votes, and it isn't even close. Utley is more than 100,000 votes ahead of the next most popular player, Astros first baseman Lance Berkman (329,723). But Utley is the only Phillies player leading at his position, which tells me that he's getting votes from all NL precincts, not just Philadelphia.

>>Early All Star Returns [Scott Lauber]

CBP Could Really Use a Good Cleaning

A sweep would be really nice, wouldn't it?

After coming home with their bats blazing in the first two games against the Rockies, the Phils will try do bring the brooms out this evening. The chances of a sweep lie in the hands of whichever Adam Eaton decides to show up. Eaton has been inconsistent with a 5.37 ERA with no wins and three losses.

With Hittin' Season in full effect, the Phils should keep the offensive barrage going against relative unknown tall guy Greg Reynolds.

With an off day tomorrow and the streaking Marlins coming into town on Friday a win this evening would give them some nice momentum going into a pretty big early season divisional match up. Get 'er done as they say.

Comment of the Week: On Bobby Abreu

Bobby Abreu checks his closet for the outfield wall before he goes to bed each night.

Loqiel in the post about Shane Victorino having a pair.